There was a time when I wanted to read all the “classics” (fiction) before I die. I also wanted to watch a lot of acclaimed movies. Of course, I enjoy reading and watching movies, but there was also FOMO. This FOMO drove me to read some classics and watch some highly acclaimed movies. I also tried to write fiction and failed miserably.
If a girl wears a short dress.
A lot of people think that quiet people are not intelligent. There will be times when some people/authority figures at your workplace or college or school overlook you and pay attention to that charming and bubbly person. Don’t worry because talent, sincerity, passion and commitment are quite loud…if you are a sincere and dedicated person then eventually people will start paying attention to your work. Just have some patience.
There will be times when you will feel like an outcast because of your ideas and opinions. Don’t worry…someday, you will find your tribe. Just have some patience.
There will be times when you will be afraid that you won’t be able to make friends. There will be times when you will think that your friend will start hanging out with that outgoing person and leave you behind. Remember that even if your friend starts hanging out with that outgoing person, you will always have your own unique gifts to offer.
Don’t start disliking that charming and the bubbly person. Instead of trying to change them and yourself, complement them. Society wants each and everyone to have the same personality but having personalities that complement each other is one of the most beautiful things in the world.
Remember that sometimes, you have to move out of your comfort zone. If the reason why you are pushing yourself is important, then go for it!
Beware of FOMO. Remember that the grass always looks greener on the other side.
Most men are afraid of associating themselves with anything feminine because in a patriarchal society, femininity is inferior to masculinity. In a culture where people say stuff like “Ladki hai kya? Mard ban, be a man!” or “Haath mein chudi pehenke rakha hai kya”. it is difficult to find men who embrace feminine things like nose rings or skirts. It takes guts for a mainstream Bollywood actor to be associated with feminine stuff. It takes guts for a mainstream Bollywood actor to say in his interview that he is hyper-sensitive.
Since childhood, Indians have been taught to take pride in OTHERS’ achievements and that’s the root of so many problems. It is okay to take pride in your religion and your culture but unfortunately, we have been taught to feel an unhealthy sense of pride in OTHERS’ achievements. That’s why some of us are so fanatical about religion, cricket and our on-screen ‘heroes’. I wish we were taught to feel a healthy sense of pride that comes from overcoming life’s challenges. A person with a healthy sense of pride won’t burn down cricketer’s effigies because he/she has already a lot of things from his/her own life to feel proud of! Unfortunately, a lot of Indians are taught to run AWAY from challenges (“Engineering kar le, future secure rahega”, “Shaadi karle varna log kya kahenge”) and hence, there is nothing to feel proud of!
We want artists to make good art but we forget that they need to make a living. We crib about lack of quality in mainstream movies but we download indie films illegally. We also forget that every time we download a movie or a book or a song illegally, we are making it difficult for an artist to to survive.
Being an introvert can be challenging…especially when you have to attend office parties. I had to attend one before Christmas and I was dreading it all along. It started with a few games, one of which I played. As the evening progressed, people started drinking and dancing. Few colleagues dragged me to the dance floor and asked me to dance…I ran away (I’m too shy!). After an hour, I slowly sneaked out of the office.I was the first person to leave the office (I do understand that some introverts like partying, dancing, etc)
We always worry about what people will think about us but we hardly think about who these “people” actually are. If we analyze deeply, we will find that we are mostly, subconsciously/unconsciously trying to impress white, heterosexual men. We might say that we want to impress our neighborhood aunty but let’s analyze: What if this aunty has a dark skin color and what if she is fat? What if she is “unattractive”? What if she had body hair? What if she is a lesbian? Will her opinion matter so much to us? Now notice how the beauty standards are constructed. A conventionally beautiful woman is thin, fair-skinned, has no body hair, etc. So we are not looking at the neighborhood aunty for who she is…we are actually looking at her from the beauty constructs of white, heterosexual men.
His Holiness The Dalai Lama will be giving a speech at KJ Somaiya College tomorrow. When I heard about it, my first reaction was, “I cannot miss this at any cost!” But my second reaction was: I’m just too tired to change two trains and travel. My third reaction was, “Come on! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!” but my fourth reaction was, ” I am just too stressed out! I just want to curl up in my blanket and read a book.” So I finally decided that I will not go. My first reaction after this decision was, “Shit I am missing out something really awesome” but I will stand by my decision despite all the F.O.M.O.